The prompt for this one was 'Light the signal bonfires. Let the call ring out. Who will carry the torch? Who will do a “make up a magical girl” page?' (I am pleased to report that, entirely unrelated to my nonsense and shenanigans, someone did in fact carry the torch).
Some Sort Of Signal Will Definitely Be Lit
"Corporal Swan."
"Yes, ma'am?"
"I've just had a call from the Information Systems team."
Silence.
"Really, Swan? Not even an innocently inquiring 'Yes, ma'am?'"
"Thought I'd shake up the formula a bit, ma'am. Keep things fresh."
"No doubt you did."
"…yes, ma'am."
"Swan, I'm speaking to you first because I suspect no-one else in the pilot corps has either the imagination or the perverse ingenuity to be responsible for this."
"Responsible for what, ma'am?"
"Swan have you been accessing civilian social media services from the ship's secure military connection? For what appears to be the purpose of soliciting short fiction from a writer who goes by the name of… SleeplessMustelid?"
"Is that a problem, ma'am?"
"Swan, I know, beyond even the faintest shadow of a doubt, that you know why InfoSys have complained about you. I also have a complaint of my own."
"Ma'am?"
"InfoSys, quite rightly, want you to register your activity with them so that they can monitor the connection for security vulnerabilities. I remind you that we are currently on deployment in an active warzone and the location of this ship is classified military information which would be invaluable to people who are actually allowed to shoot at you, much as I sometimes wish their accuracy was better in that regard."
"I'll be more careful, ma'am."
"You'll do what InfoSys tell you, Swan. My concern is that your conduct on this site, if traced back to us, would be an open-and-shut 'dragging into disrepute' case."
"Really, ma'am?"
"Swan you get into flame wars with this poor writer on a near-daily basis, when your responses to their posts are coherent at all."
"He's an excellent writer, ma'am, I simply want to express the intensity of my regard for his work."
"You appear to have chosen to do so in the style of an excitable teenager who does not get enough direct sunlight."
"Well, that would make people less likely to assume I am in fact a decorated pilot, wouldn't it, ma'am?"
(special love to my dear nemesisfriend
caffeinatedotter aka CaffeinatedOtter, which is in no way a synonym for SleeplessMustelid)